However，they did not notice the barn or realize what it could mean for them．He moved closer toward them to get their attention，but they just moved away from him out of fear．He went into the house and came back with some bread，broke it up，and made a bread trail to the barn．They still did not catch on．

Starting to get frustrated，he went over and tried to drive them toward the barn．They panicked and scattered into every direction except toward the barn ．Nothing he did could get them to go into the barn where there was warmth，safety，and shelter．Feeling totally frustrated，he exclaimed，“Why don’t they follow me?Can’t they see this is the only place where they can survive the storm?How can I possibly get them into the one place to save them?”

1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右；

2. 至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的词语；

3. 续写部分分两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；

4. 续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语；

Paragraph 1：He thought for a moment and realized that they just would not follow a human.

Paragraph 2: Just then, a good idea occurred to his mind.

我的续写：

Paragraph 1：He thought for a moment and realized that they just would not follow a human. He threw a confusing glance at the swansin the distance, his heart sinking at the sight of their weak wandering. Some tried in vain to fly, honking at him in a panic. “You are too weak.” he murmured with a deep sigh. But out of his eyes’ corner, he unexpectedly found two swans carefully picked up the food nearby and spread their wings excitedly, casting him an understanding and grateful eye. “They like it. They like it,” cried he in ecstasy.

Paragraph 2: Just then, a good idea occurred to his mind. He realized that it was distrust that prevented them following him. He put the food where swans gathered and left quietly. Then, he stood at the gate of the barn, waiting for them patiently. Every day, he did it without any complaint, as tenderly as a mother cared for her daughter. One day, it was snowingheavily, the farmer standing still with snow all over. But look, toward the snowman were flying the swans slowly and happily like the most beautiful snowflake. He knew it was the most precious gift he had ever received—trust.

一、如何立意

读后续写，首先要立意。考生一定要记住，好的记叙文不是高大上的词汇的堆砌，而是有思想有灵魂。

看到这篇作文的材料，前面大意是： 寒冬，一个农民想给受困的天鹅一个庇护所，但无奈他无论怎么去做，天鹅就是不进去。他绝望了。

如何续写，要抓住续写的两个段落句子，我们可以断定： 第一段是写他的烦恼以及解决问题的苗头出来了；第二段写开始实施计划。

这段文字看起来没有什么，所以续写很多就是泛泛而谈，最后成了纯粹的干巴巴的记叙，有的虽然看起来很生动，但看完后不是情节荒谬，就是不知道说什么。

我的想法这样的：

农民这种为天鹅不顾一切去做事情，本身就是一种很高尚的精神。那么究竟什么导致天鹅不顺从他？

答案是：信任。

当动物不信任一个人的时候，就会恐惧。反之，就会无限接近。我小时候养过十几只鹅，每天我都给它们喂食，带他们去田野里山坡上吃草。每当我放回回家还在村里老远处，他们就高声叫喊。我一靠近它们，纷纷用嘴在我的身上亲个不停。

想到此，我的眼睛竟然有点湿润。我的思维就有了。我的所想无时无刻不在感动我。一个作者在写之前的构思都不能打动他，那么我只能说这篇作文完全看漂亮的词汇了。好在高考对作文记叙文的构思要求也不是多高，只要逻辑得当，情节合情合理就可以了。

写作构思的时候，要学会把自己完全沉浸文字中，我想起了王尔德的夜莺与玫瑰：

不过夜莺的歌声却越来越弱了，她的一双小翅膀开始扑打起来，一层雾膜爬上了她的双目。她的歌声变得更弱了，她觉得喉咙给什麽东西堵住了。

这时她唱出了最后一曲。明月听著歌声，竟然忘记了黎明，只顾在天空中徘徊。红玫瑰听到歌声，更是欣喜若狂，张开了所有的花瓣去迎接凉凉的晨风。回声把歌声带回自己山中的紫色洞穴中，把酣睡的牧童从梦乡中唤醒。歌声飘越过河中的芦苇，芦苇又把声音传给大海。

“快看，快看！”树叫了起来，“玫瑰已长好了。”可是夜莺没有回答，因为她已经躺在长长的草丛中死去了，心口上还扎著那根刺。

为什么我偏偏想起这个？因为我觉得文学作品打动心灵，往往需要一点悲剧情调色彩。请读者不要误解。这种悲剧不一定就是否定消极的，有时是为了烘托主人公的高贵。

譬如这个农民，我想象，他在大雪里成为一个雪人，风雪夜归人，目的就是为了等待天鹅。文学创作往往讲究的就是这个格调，艺术之美。好的记叙文，应该就像一幅画定格在那里。读毛主席的：待到山花烂漫时，她在丛中笑。这个画面就让我想到一个女孩，巧笑倩兮。

二、如何组织思维

文学创作的手法非常之多，我最近总结了：挖掘思想16式、结构框架19式、刻画形象10式、修辞运用14式。但无论哪种，都离不开：环境、心理活动、动作三种。同时注意角色之间的关系逻辑发展线。也就是说，一个角色所做必然和另一个角色的回应形成逻辑链。就读后续写而言，两段，一般而言：每一段最后都有个悬念，第一段悬念的解决为第二段的悬念做铺垫。

第一段写：农民的苦闷、突然的转机

The farmer’s confusion, frustration, pitiful --> the swans’ weakness (写农民的困惑和同情，要用天鹅的可怜来衬托) -->接着写swan的细节：try to fly but in vain, honk --> the farmer’s response（写天鹅的痛苦，又要用农民的反馈来衬托）-->开始写第一个悬念的解决：swans carefully picked up the food nearby. -->写农民的心情

这在语篇中叫主位关系，即：A --> B；B-->C; C-->D。

第二段写：农民的问题解决，并且升华主题

情节一定要合乎生活常识。有同学写，让人化妆成为天鹅，然后天鹅就跟着他走。还有人写，让鸭子混在其中，然后带着天鹅走。这都是违背生活常理的。因为天鹅是智商很高的。

农民每天都喂养天鹅，慢慢赢得了天鹅的信任，然后有一天天降大雪，天鹅很自然走向农夫。

我写作的时候，很多时候都是先想好一个感人的画面：

雪地里的一尊雕像

我接下来的情节都是为了刻画这个雕像的精神来写的。

三、如何措辞

心理活动的细节描写：

threw a confusing glance

his heart sinking at the sight of

honking at him in a panic

casting him a grateful eye

cried he in ecstasy

修辞：比喻

as tenderly as a mother cared for her daughter

like the most beautiful snowflake

语法结构：

非谓语动词（尤其是独立主格结构）、倒装句、强调句返回搜狐，查看更多